Film Review: Casablanca

2009 January 9

Some people have criticized my criticisms of film, but I think I’m just ahead of the curve in the film review world. Where some people go wrong (ok, everyone) is by reviewing bad things. Ugh. No need to do that, bring down the whole average. Anyway, this day’s film review is of Casablanca.

Casablanca: Five Stars

Alright, so, Casablanca… Um, the movie’s in this place somewhere in France, but not France, the desert sort of… Um, Morocco, just looked it up. Anyway, in Morocco, everyone speaks English, but with accents to show what country they’re from where they all speak English.

The french police are mean, and Rick’s the owner of a bar/casino and he’s really cool and doesn’t like anyone. And this guy shoots police and yells and get’s arrested, and Rick’s all “Whatever.” But wait, he does like Sam. Sam’s cool too, and he plays the piano and they hang out and drink and Rick yells at him to play the piano. There’s a girl Ilsa and she’s pretty and her boyfriend (who turns out to be her dead husband who’s not really dead) fights Nazis and that’s cool because nobody likes Nazis and they all sing the French national anthem and cry and stuff and Rick makes her leave with her husband and he and the french police guy walk around the airport.

Related posts:

  1. Film Review: Crank
  2. Film Review: Annie Hall
  3. Film Review: Citizen Kane
  4. Film Review: Forrest Gump

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