Well folks, if you’re not already following me on Twitter, you missed out on the beginning of a revolution last night. It all started when I recorded The Fast & The Furious: Tokyo Drift a few weeks ago because I thought, “I bet that’s bad.” As it turns out, it may be the best movie I have ever seen. Ever. In fact, I was so Fastly & Furiously hung over from it today that I had to watch five hours of cool cars crashing into each other before I could even get out of bed.
Of course, the movie was the best movie I’ve ever seen, but how does that help you? Well, I tweeted about it. My tweets included such gems as: “I like the driving fast cars aspects of this film, but the emotional elements are leaving me pretty confused. More racing! Less break-ups!”And then, when things got more intense: “This race is too intense! THE ROAD IS SO NARROW FOR DRIFTING!” It was a rollercoaster of emotion, but now, one that you can capture from your own home every week.
All you have to do is follow me on Twitter! This coming Monday I will be watching “Shoot ‘Em Up” because I saw it on cable once and thought “I think this movie will be ridiculous.” I invite all of you to rent the movie, or find it on your Tivo’s and watch it with me at the same time as I provide my incisive, all too excitable, commentary via Twitter.
It’s a Movie Monday revolution that someday our grandchildren will learn about in history class because by then it will have replaced the real revolution in terms of relevance to American culture as well as badassness.
Thanks to a complicated scientific experiment gone horribly awry, every Friday if I am able to properly position my newspaper on the coffee table, a wormhole opens up that allows me to see the headlines from years and years into the future. It may sound complicated and far-fetched, but believe me, being able to see these headlines has been both a blessing and a curse. So, naturally, I figured I would share that ability with you. read more…
Hey y’all. My name’s Jamie and I’m Colby Day’s newest intern. He asked me to do a column about what moving here to New York for an internship’s like. I’ve never written anything before (except for YouTube comments) so I’m pretty excited! read more…
Who would’ve know that taking one celebrity’s head and putting it on another celebrity’s body could be this amusing?
You can see the first installment here, if you so desire. I apologize for the fact that you had to watch an advertisement, but if you really want to get back at those guys, try not buying their product. They hate it when you do that.
Many readers regularly e-mail to ask things like, “Colby, how can I be as multi-talented and attractive as you are?” or “What is the appropriate holiday tip for a doorman?” While the thousands of e-mails I get like that can be flattering, they’re also somewhat of a drag on my time. I simply can’t give out life advice all the time. However, Phil Greely, our resident advice columnist, will be able to from now on in this weekly column: Ask A Guy Riding a Unicycle. read more…
As people complain more and more about the death of the newspaper (and yet that damned thing keeps making its way to my doorstep), many are wondering just how the news can sustain itself in such tough economic times. Fortunately, I believe I have come up with a solution that will not only please those hoping to gain valuable information about the world around them, but also large corporations hoping to trick the ignorant masses who still read the news into purchasing their products.
I am proud to present, for the first time ever: Sponsored News.read more…
Thank you very much for not noticing my extraordinarily long absence. I know it must have been difficult to remain silent so long, but without your silent consent I may never have been able to not entertain you for all this time.
I know it was hard for all of you waking up each day to find I hadn’t taken four seconds out of my day to just post a link to someone else’s hard work. But imagine how hard it was for me to not post occasional self-promotional plugs (speaking of which, new episodes of College Cooking 101 are now available at www.CollegeCooking101.net) or commentary on which fast food chain has the best chicken sandwich (Wendy’s, and I’m going to keep saying it until I get some for free).
Trust me, I love clogging the internet! Not only do I think my opinions are more important that everyone else’s, but I’m also terrified of this intricate computer network gaining the power of sentient thought. I had hoped that the vast outpouring of rage and confusion over my absence might just be the shock needed to completely overburden the internet and shut it down. But it seems I was wrong, and while I don’t apologize for anything ever, if I did it would be for that.
Well, internet, I’m back in my tireless pursuit to defeat our future technological slave masters while simultaneously entertaining you with my sporadic thoughts (I prefer to only think when absolutely necessary, and mostly about food). Because clearly, readers, you haven’t exactly been vocal enough about missing me to do it yourselves.
I’m putting this up without even watching it, I’m that confident in Zach Galifianakis’ funniness. Now, without further adieu, Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis and Natalie Portman.
USA Today reported this morning that The Chicago Museum of Science and Industry is opening a new exhibit in the hopes of gaining visitors in this troubled economy. The new exhibit will be dedicated to Harry Potter, and designed to capitalize on how much children like the character. Simultaneously, the museum is hoping to capitalize on how much children dislike science. read more…
First of all, thanks to all of you who watched College Cooking 101’s pilot episode, and thanks to me for bringing it to you. I’m sure you enjoyed it, and learned a lot about cooking as well as about the Pope’s checkered past. If you haven’t seen it yet, you still can by visiting the show’s website. If you did, I’ll bet you were beginning to worry whether you would ever get to see more of it. Well, my friends, the answer is yes. Keep reading to find out how (read: more video below). read more…
Many readers regularly e-mail to ask things like, “Colby, how can I be as multi-talented and attractive as you are?” or “What is the appropriate holiday tip for a doorman?” While the thousands of e-mails I get like that can be flattering, they’re also somewhat of a drag on my time. I simply can’t give out life advice all the time. However, Phil Greely, our resident advice columnist, will be able to from now on in this weekly column: Ask A Guy Riding a Unicycle.